his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
