The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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