I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
