Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Randomize
