i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
