Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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