So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
