I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
