I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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