She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
