on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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