At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize
