whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Randomize