So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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