White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Randomize
