My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
