i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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