Just fell off a train. Bad.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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