i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
