I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
