Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
