Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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