I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
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