just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Send help, water and tortillas.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
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