he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
40s are totally the cure
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
