girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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