Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
