just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
