office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Randomize
