i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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