sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I love black thongs
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
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