It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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