Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
