I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I need a burrito and a hug.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
