Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
