yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize
