maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
