I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
