Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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