should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I party with great urgency now.
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