I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Randomize
