why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
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