There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
