He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
