goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
