i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
