Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
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