:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
third nipple confirmed
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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