Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I can tuck mytits in my pants
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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