Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
