did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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